Saturday, October 25, 2008

The obsession begins

Anyone who knows me knows I am a complete control freak. Well, I tried to give up my control issues when we started TTC. I told my husband that I wanted to get pregnant naturally. My exact words were "I do not want to be one of those girls who sticks her butt in the air and has sex at certain times to get pregnant". Well, that happened when I got pregnant the 1st time. I think that has been something that is hard for me to accept. To me, my first pregnancy was almost perfect. It happened the way I wanted it to, my due date was perfect because I could take the rest of the school year off and spend 4 months with my baby, and I would be pregnant in winter. The only thing that was not perfect was the pregnancy itself. It is weird how things can change in a matter of a day. Now that I have had my miscarriage I do not care about any of that stuff, I just want to be pregnant again. I will gladly stick my butt in the air after sex, have sex when my OPKs tell me to, spend only 6 weeks with my baby, and be pregnant in the heat of summer. I just want a family.

I am now 4 days past ovulation and I am obsessing about the possibility of being pregnant again. God, please send me a baby.

4 comments:

Amy said...

In my prayers that a baby fish has been made!

I'm okay with you being huge in summer too...that way I'll look skinny in my bikini! :-PPP

Jess said...

I'm also a control freak and I think many of us become that way after m/c. Best of luck this cycle!!

Crys said...

I couldn't have said it any better! Hope you get a BFP soon.

amanda said...

good luck... i hope you are sent a baby so soon.